Mercy That Changed My Forever

It was an act of mercy I shall never forget. It was a Thursday - 1978 - 5^th period – 11^th grade English that I first noticed. I realized she no longer calls on me publicly in class for the answer to a question – she knew I would get it wrong. Typically, in life, when that happens, it’s indicative a person may have given up on you. However, to me, it was an act of mercy. No longer would I have to endure the in-class public shame and embarrassment that accompanied my particular brand of illiteracy.  It’s not that I was particularly stupid, it was that I was literally the education product of a two-teacher, two-room school house (1^st–6^th grades), from a small, barely existing mining town. My father was a forest ranger there. Fast forward a couple years and I’m in that class in a large high school. It would be the next Tuesday as class was dismissing that I heard, “would you please wait after class,” directed at me. My body language was screaming, “please just get it over with, I know I don’t know.” She sat on the corner of the desk next to me and we exchanged a moment of silence – I thought I knew what was coming. When I looked up, with tear filled eyes she said, “nobody ever taught you this, did they?” That’s not what I expected. My eyes watering in a sort of grateful humiliation was all the response I could muster. She was not abandoning me; she was assessing my willingness to come to her for the help I needed. 

There you have it. Her brand of mercy was not just the tenderness of heart which disposes a person to overlook error, but the willingness to reach down with an offer to lift. Justice would require her to fail me. But her brand of mercy would help me make the payment that justice required. I spent enough extra time with her that I would make it through her class. Mercy is often justice that someone else pays for.  She helped me enough that the demands of justice in her class could be met. 

If you want mercy from the Lord, you must give it to your fellow man. If you do not show mercy to your fellow man, the Lord cannot provide it to you. There is a law which binds the Lord to the same standard you set for yourself. It is an irrevocable law.  The Lord teaches us to show mercy so that we might merit mercy. We are the final beneficiaries of all the mercy we show to others. It really is true that that which we send out shall return to us again. This is called ‘karma’ in another faith. It is a true principle. Perhaps it operates within a larger time frame than just this life, but it operates nonetheless. (Glossary of gospel terms, second edition)

I should have, but never did, made my way back to her class after I graduated to thank her. Not only for helping me get through that class, but for the merciful act that changed my forever.

Signed

John The-Not-So-Beloved